Where I Once Died...

[nightblood]

It was a cold, dark night... just how she liked it. The wolf took it as a good sign as she neared the border of Arnlan, her old home. Almost six months ago, she had been attacked by Nightshade, the leader of Sallin, not far from where she stood now. The injuries should have been fatal, bloody reflections of the scars she carried now. Her black and red-brown coat held a mess of gaps where fur refused to grow over the old wounds. She felt the cold more than ever now, the scar tissue being uninsulated against the night air. She shivered as she limped forward, the pendant that hung around her neck slapping against the exposed skin on her neck. No longer a fang, but a bullet attached to a black string now resided there, reminding her of just how close she had come to death... again.

The female paused and stood on the border for a moment, hesitating before sitting down. She didn't need to wait for a sentry, if there were any. She was a part of this pack. She inhaled the scent of her home, happy to have it fill her lungs after such a long time. Her worst fears were put to rest. The scent of Sallin was gone from this area. Arnlan and its inhabitants remained safe here. What thrilled her even more was the fact that her eldest daughter's scent was strong here. Perhaps she had taken up her old duties. It would be ironic, but at least she wouldn't have to work her old job any more. She could use a good rest after what she'd gone through.

She remained on the border for a long while, contemplating the nature of her return. Should she walk right in? Head for her den and lay down without speaking to anyone? It would be great fun, playing the part of a ghost. Then again, this really was no laughing matter. To her packmates, she had been dead for a good six months now. Her second litter would be about a year old now, or just under. She shook her head, throwing the idea away. No, that would be too cruel. It would be funny and at the same time, she could evade any hysterical cries from her old friends, but it would be too cruel on her loved ones. Next idea.

The dark wolf turned her good eye in the opposite direction, keeping a watch for any activity that her ears didn't pick up. She snorted and returned her attention to the shadows of Arnlan. She could walk the border herself, patrolling as she once did. No, that was a stupid idea. Though, again, she would seem as a ghost, if she had to accept anyone, she'd mess it up. The new member would announce that he or she had been accepted by a black female with a red-brown undercoat and a necklace. They'd either be killed for lying and intruding, or be attacked for saying such things. Neither outcome would help her.

The next idea came to her in an instant. She would travel to her old haunts. There was no need to stay on the border any longer. Soon, she'd be found by a sentry and the screams would commence. However, she couldn't avoid them, so she'd seek them out. If she found no one by the time she reached her den, she could report that she had, in fact, looked for her friends when she arrived, couldn't find them, and resorted to keeping up her strength by resting a while before going out again.

NightBlood stood up and shook her fur free of dirt. She placed a careful paw forward, keeping her eye trained on the shadows. Plenty of dark wolves used them for cover. Seeing no shine of green or blue, or glint of fang, necklace or otherwise, she walked steadily forward. She had to keep herself from running. She wanted so badly to be in the company of her friends and family again. She reminded herself of the shrieks and cries she would get if she was seen and opted that it was better to lurk in the shadows when she saw someone and wait for the best time to reveal herself.

Carefully, silently, she too used the shadows to her advantage and headed first toward the hunting grounds where she had first trained with Armageddon the day after he had been accepted. From there, perhaps she would travel to Mortil's Training Grounds. Or... perhaps not. No, she wouldn't know how he would react or wether or not Umbra would attack a ghost. No. She would head to the pack's training area if she didn't find anyone at the hunting grounds.

[Blackfeathr]

Most of the birds had fleed south for the upcoming cold months, so the forest was silent. No snow had fallen yet, but the frost on the ground stung at the feet of those who trod upon it.
A dry, cold wind interlaced the black forked trees of Arnlan, bringing a hesitant promise of winter.
The grounds were silent. All that could be heard were the creaks and groans of dead trees scraping against their live brothers.
The creek nearby was quietly running gently and swiftly in the cut of the land, its cold depths untouchable.

A lone mouse scurried about, searching for the last bits of food through the dying grass blades. The dark creature looked up, its whiskers extending out to taste the air of anything looking for it as a source of food. Its tiny ears and whiskers did not, however, pick up a giant, black paw that came down and caught its little body between pawpads.

It writhed and squealed as it was lifted up in the air by one foot. Using its body as its own climbing post, it bit with all its strength on the pawpad.

"Ouch!" Armageddon yelped, nearly losing his grip of the mouse. Muttering curse words under snarls, he bit the little vermin's head off in retaliation.



BloodBound was just a few feet away, his head stuck in thick brambles and nettles, sniffing around for any recent trails of prey. He had been hunting with his father for the past three hours, and he was beginning to tire. However, his stomach growling and hunger pains kept him going. He came across a fresh scent and his tail raised and waved happily.
"Hey dad! I think I found something! Could be a deer... or a rabbit... or a fish!" He chirped happily. This was the happiest he'd been in a very long time. Hunting with his father always brightened his mood and took his mind off of... other things.

He looked up to see his dads back to him, but he could see the little headless mouse dangling from his teeth. Far be it from BloodBound to beg, but... the blood dripping from its decapitated body looked so delicious... it would surely dull the sharp, painful edge of his hunger....

"Oooh Dad, is that for me? I'm sure hungry... Lucky for you, you ate the brains... rip off a leg or two, or three for me?" He bounded over and went to nip at his father playfully for a bite of his little scrap of meat, but out of the corner of his eye he noticed that they were not alone.

A large figure stood between the trees at the threshold of the hunting grounds. The wolf looked like Zuka and him, but it was... darker... and this wolf looked like it took a beating. He stopped dead, staring at it and scenting the air, trying to decipher who this stranger was.

He caught the scent of a female... and another scent... it was nothing he'd ever scented before, no one he thought he ever met... but the smell was... familiar to him, it brought forth more primitive, infantile memories... A part of her smelled like him, but there was something more...

"...Mom?" BloodBound whispered, wide eyed.


Armageddon did not turn around, but sighed grimly.
"Zuka, stop playing tricks on your brother... you know it upsets him. And it upsets me. Now cut it out." He growled darkly.

[nightblood]

Zuka had been tracking her father and younger brother for a while now with Kuruk hot on her tail. She was testing his scenting abilities, mixing her own scent in among that of her family members. Although he'd probably be able to tell Armageddon's from hers, she doubted he'd be able to catch BloodBound's scent, as they had been spending a lot more time together as of late. It was mainly because his pelt reminded her of her mother's. She was missing NightBlood terribly now that she had found Archer, her old mate, and wished she could know what she thought about the subject. Of course, she hadn't told anyone about him just yet.

Kuruk growled when he found his sister was trying to play a trick on him. It was a feeble attempt. Even a pup could tell the difference between male and female scents. Zuka was stepping in BloodBound's paw prints. It wasn't hard to figure out. He picked up the pace, wanting to end this less than helpful exorcize in favor of a bit of strength training. Maybe he could convince his older sister to let him carry her to the training grounds again. He doubted it, but it was worth a shot.

The tan wolfess heard the quick movements of the younger male from a few yards behind her, but didn't stop. Instead, she picked up her own pace. She could smell blood in the air and wanted to see if there was food to be had where the boys were up ahead. She spotted Armageddon first and folded her ears when she saw that it was only a mouse he had caught. She slowed down for a moment, but grinned when she saw BloodBound behind him. He seemed distracted. Perhaps she could sneak up on him. She slowed to a low creep and motioned toward the black wolf to not alert his son. She wanted to see if he would notice.

Kuruk rolled his eyes when he caught up with his big sister. He sat down beside Armageddon and snorted at Zuka's behavior. Then the smell of fresh kill got to him and he attempted to bite off the tail of the mouse that his father had caught. Rat and mouse tails were his favorite treat. There wasn't much fur, so it had more of a flavor than most of his meals. After that, he sat idly and watched Zuka and BloodBound. Something about his brother had him worried. Why did he seem so distracted? He wasn't in a hunting crouch, so he obviously didn't see any prey off in the distance. So what was he staring at?

NightBlood stopped short of coming any further out into the open. She caught sight of a number of figures off in the distance. It was only when one of those figures seemed to stop and stare at her that she noticed she was standing in the moonlight. Cursing the clear night, she slunk slowly back into the shadows and tried to hide most of her form behind a tree. She crouched down and stared at the figures before her. Three... maybe four. She was upwind of them, so she couldn't tell who they were by scent and she was sure they'd catch her scent within a few minutes. She couldn't avoid them forever, but she wanted to know who she was going to be dealing with first.

The female stared hard at the one who had seen her first. It was an almost exact mirror of her younger self. That was BloodBound. She was sure of it. The one directly behind him was black, but their back was turned. It could be one of four Arnlanian wolves that she knew of. Armageddon, Sofika, Karolek, or RavenShard. The other one or two behind them were too far away to see.

Kuruk growled again at Zuka's playfulness. She was entirely too bubbly as of late. In his annoyance, he batted at the pendant that hung around his neck. His mother's fang necklace twirled about in mid air before being swatted again, only to repeat the same process. As he sighed in boredom, Kuruk attempted to figure out why his sister was acting so weird. He'd blame breeding, but both of her parents were strict warriors. If anything, he should be the crazy one. Armageddon was a lot more fun than Zuka's dad had been. Perhaps that was why. She was imitating Armegeddon's playfulness. At least, his playfulness while NightBlood was alive.

[Blackfeathr]

The thin male smiled tiredly, his tail brushing across the frosted ground upon seeing his step-daughter and son walk into their clearing. Zuka must have decided to stop taunting BloodBound and decided to join their hunting party. Kuruk followed close behind Zuka until she'd started stalking BloodBound, ready to scare him. Poor kid didn't catch a break. Kuruk sat down next to him, grabbing the mouses tail. Armageddon pulled in the opposite direction, helping his son get as much of the tail off as he could.

Armageddon really enjoyed having children... or well, his step-children had turned into beautiful and strong adolescents... he made sure to keep this fact to himself, calling Zuka beautiful might lead to her pinning him down. Ah, so much like her mother indeed. Even if Zuka was not technically his daughter, he'd love her just the same. It was just in his blood. Well... maybe not in most of his blood....
BloodBound and Kuruk still had some growing left to do. BloodBound had definitely grown out, musclewise... He was looking to be a very tall and well-built wolf. Kuruk had done a lot of self-training, day and night, something Armageddon didn't agree with... it was too hard on the body... on the mind.
But Kuruk was well built, more so than what his genes destined him to be. He had to give him kudos for that. Even with Armageddon's silly thin likeness, Kuruk still was able to look formidable, on his effort alone.
He needed to slow down. Can't change the past. No matter how much you want to.


BloodBound had been so entranced with this figure that he hadn't noticed Zuka behind him. She could have tackled him for all he knew. Then again it wouldn't phase him much, Zuka might move him a couple steps, it was pretty hard to get him to fall down for most wolves, if they were running at him at full ramming speed.

And as quickly as the figure had materialized, she ducked behind a tree. He could still see a small part of her, but she crouched, and the distance could now trick his eyes into making him unsure.
Guilty wolves always hide, his father's words resonated in his skull.
BloodBound's well-hidden, more assertive side surfaced, and he growled, setting off after the figure at a canter. If there was a guilty wolf in Arnlan, he'd find out why. His thick build alone made him intimidating enough. No one needed to know he couldn't walk the walk, most of the time. In his right mind, that is.


BloodBound's rarely-heard growl caught Armageddons attention and he turned around to see his son cantering toward the top of the hill. He dropped the mouse on the ground. It was anyones meal now, because he scented something strange.
He felt like he was thrown back into the past... or confronted with a ghost.

He smelled her again... he smelled NightBlood.
He shook his head, turning back and trotting towards the bushes again to investigate a gopher hole. He'd been smelling her scent for months now, every so often he'd get a strong whiff of her... he always attributed it to her ghost being around. That sometimes happens. Now BloodBound was a victim of it as well. He would learn the hard way.

[nightblood]

NightBlood shivered as her mirror image started to approach. It wasn't a rapid pace, so she had time to get away, but her feet were frozen in the frost. She was having second thoughts about this. She wanted desperately to be with her family again, but was she ready? They thought she was dead! She had, at most, two more minutes before she stopped being a ghost for good. Her heart raced and rose up until it was caught in her throat. Her breathing increased, sending jets of steam rising from her open muzzle. She tried again to move, but only succeeded in her front half jumping two inches off the ground in the direction of the border. She was deathly afraid of what they would say.

First, there'd be the shock factor. Then there'd be the disbelief. They'd probably come up to her, sniffing and poking. After that would come denial, maybe, or the tears for those who accepted it first. Then would come the questions and, most dreaded, the assumptions. She didn't want them to think she had abandoned them. Right now, as she looked over the last six months, it really seemed like she had. She could have left sooner, ran away from that vet as soon as she was able to travel. But she had stayed. Simply because she didn't know where she was. But that hadn't stopped her last time. And this time, she had children to return to! Oh, why hadn't she left sooner?

Zuka growled as BloodBound started to walk off. Oh no, he didn't. Her little brother wouldn't escape her so easily! None of her targets would ever get the better of her! She took a few more steps forward before gathering her paws under her and pouncing at her brother, aiming herself directly onto his back. There was the possibility that she had miscalculated his speed and therefore might end up on his tail or even in the dirt, but she'd get him eventually... some how.

Kuruk grinned to himself when his dad dropped the mouse. He took it up eagerly, telling himself that he'd get Armegeddon a rabbit to make up for it. He needed a good hunt right about now. And now that he had delved into a snack, he'd be able to concentrate on his prey easily. However, now was, apparently, not the time for hunting. When he looked over to the dark male, he saw that his attention was now on BloodBound, who was trotting away with Zuka right on his tail. What on earth was he so fixed on seeing?

The answer hit him square in the nose, quite literally. A gentle breeze brought with it an old scent that he had only ever caught in the den and the training grounds, as well as a slight remainder of it in RavenShard's den (he'd often visited to have his training injuries looked over). Kuruk stood up sharply and began to match BloodBound's canter, passing Armageddon quickly and coming up on Zuka's flank. Whatever BloodBound had seen, it must be linked with this smell. He didn't get distracted very easily.

"Come on, kid! Keep up- OOF!!"

The collision sent Zuka and Kuruk tumbling into each other, their heads connecting as soon as Surethim crashed into his sister. The aftermath was a sight to behold. With Kuruk on the bottom of a three-wolf pile-up. Zuka's head rested on his shoulders with both sets of paws splayed in different directions. Kuruk's lower half was the only bit of him that had somehow withstood the carnage and was still standing with his chest connected to the ground. Surethim, at the top, was draped over his sister cross-wise as he rested on her back, his tongue lolling out of his mouth as his ears rang from the impact.

"Right... I think I'll stay down, if that's alright with you," Motega laughed as he gazed upon the pile of siblings.

Kuruk shook his head clear of the stunned state it was in and growled up at his older brother and sister. "Off."

Immediately, Zuka turned over and flipped off of him, landing with Surethim pinned beneath her. "Wanna watch where you're going, next time?" she asked, pressing a paw to his throat. Surethim gagged at the pressure on his neck and grinned up at his sister.

"Yep!"

NightBlood laughed inwardly at her children. They'd grown up to be fine, albeit clumsy, young adults. She could hardly believe that the handsome golden wolf that had just appeared was actually her own Surethim, or the young dark male there was Motega. And Zuka looked like she could take on the world, despite her lack of height. It was Kuruk who surprised her the most. It seemed like he had been trying to defy his lanky stature every day of his life since she had been taken away. There was a glint of white in the moonlight as they were tumbling from the run-in with Surethim. He had kept her necklace. The fact made her smile.

Her eyes traveled back to the figure still caped in shadow. Now that it had turned to face her, she could tell it wasn't either one of her alphas. It was either RavenShard or Armageddon. With no tang of wolf blood in the air, there was no reason for the shaman to be near. That lanky figure had to be her mate.

[Blackfeathr]

Kuruk seemed to catch on and follow close behind, however it wasn't long until he was thwarted by his other siblings.

BloodBound felt a brush of paws on his back, and then they were yanked away. He turned around, looking at the curious pile of wolves to his left. Apparently Zuka had a failed attempt to pounce him, ending up instead on top of Surethim, who was on top of Kuruk.
Stealing another glance back at his target, he allowed himself to be distracted, for just a moment.

"What fine timing, Zuka... vigilance, constant vigilance..." he taunted playfully at his half-sister, grinning and poking her with a large tan paw. He'd been in training for the good half of his life, he just preferred not to be involved in any of the "revenge" things. Hell, he doubted he'd even use these fighting tactics, ever. Sallin seemed quiet enough and that was all right for him. Sure, he might be seen as a coward... or somehow, disrespecting the dead... but for some reason, it just wasn't in him to go on a bloodbath killing spree. It might be what his siblings wanted, what Arnlan wanted, but somehow, he thought it might not be what his father, or mother wanted.

He chuckled lowly. "Well, look who's here..." he glanced at Surethim and Motega in the shadows, "'Fraid there's not much luck finding prey around these parts... I think we out-hunted this area." His voice cracked a little. He was starting the transition to maturity, and his voice was getting very deep and chesty. It was slowly winning over his vocal cords but he would still get those moments when that puppy voice would break through. He cleared this throat a bit, and looked back to the trees hiding that mysterious, but familiar smelling figure.

A lone cloud obscured the moon, and he narrowed his black-rimmed eyes. He used this cloak of darkness to move on again, while the others were distracted. For once, he wanted to be in the foreground of things. Perhaps bringing some sniveling wierd-smelling wolf to justice would show them he's not such a featherweight, metaphorically of course.

Finally getting halfway up the rim of the bowl that cradled the clearing, he shouted into the darkness. "Show yourself, wolf. Why do you hide." His voice didn't crack this time, its booming resonance sounding quite fearsome. Though, truth be told, he didn't even know if he was talking to anyone anymore... this wolf could have used the darkness to their advantage as well.

[nightblood]

"What fine timing, Zuka... vigilance, constant vigilance..."

Zuka snapped playfully at her little brother's paw as she let Surethim up. She jerked in surprise when Kuruk's tail brushed just under her nose as he passed her. She and the golden brother looked on in curiosity as he moved forward with purpose, the same thought on both their minds. Motega too caught his strange behavior and followed him with questioning eyes.

"Well, look who's here..." BloodBound glanced at Surethim and Motega in the shadows, "'Fraid there's not much luck finding prey around these parts... I think we out-hunted this area."

His voice was enough to grab the three's attention for the moment after they saw that Kuruk had stopped just before the shadow line.

"Wasn't hunting," Surethim growled as he licked a slightly twisted paw.

"Just chasing," Motega pipped up as he stood and wagged his tail. Surethim batted playfully at it, to which he received a small growl and a quick bite to the ear, but not enough to draw blood. Motega was always in good spirits after a nice run.

Seriousness washed over the group when they watched BloodBound catch up with Kuruk. Something was definitely up. It was one thing to have Kuruk acting strangely, but when BloodBound was serious, it was cause for concern. Because of his height, Surethim was the first to catch the familiar scent. His eyes widened in shock and disbelief. There was no way that scent should be this fresh. Not here, not anywhere in Arnaln. He walked cautiously forward and stopped when he joined his brothers. They'd detected her first. He'd let them lead.

"Show yourself, wolf. Why do you hide."

Zuka and Motega jumped at the order. Were they dealing with an intruder? Excitement rippled through both their pelts, though it was fear on Zuka's side. She was the Scout here. It was her job to take care of intruders well before they got this far into the territory. She'd be reprimanded for sure. The dread showed in her movement as she followed Motega to join the others.

NightBlood had used the distraction to her advantage. She ran back a few steps and disappeared into a hollow tree. There was a knot in the tree that allowed her to look out at the wolves without letting them see her. She dragged her tail in closely against her to make sure none of her fur was seen. She couldn't completely ignore BloodBound's order. He almost sounded like she did when she was barking commands around. Despite his young age, if he had her temper, he was nothing to laugh at. She at least needed to answer him.

"Waiting..."

Her voice, though scratchy from the wound on her throat, would have been familiar if it hadn't been for the echo that distorted it further. She was suddenly very grateful that she had taken refuge here. She gazed out to the gathering of her children. It seemed that both Surethim and Kuruk had caught her scent. It was only a matter of time before the other two found it. Still, she had decided that if she was going to show herself, she wanted to get the waterworks over with as soon as possible. She would make them wait for the rest of her brood to show up. Only about half of them were here.

"For who?" came Kuruk's equally authoritative tone.

"The rest," NightBlood answered, "Delerath, Khai, Orem, Tamarah, Dakarai, Khenti..."

Kuruk gulped at the request to see more of their family and turned to catch BloodBound's eye. What would they do? Would they tell this supposed stranger that it was impossible? After all, this could still be a trap. Perhaps Sallin had come to finish the job that they had set out to do when they started with NightBlood. Perhaps her scent was a camouflage, somehow. Had they kept her leg or something? Whatever the case was, they couldn't produce three of the six the voice had mentioned. They were buried at the edge of the training ground.

It was Zuka who growled and stepped forward, not wanting to drag this on forever. She wanted to see what the big deal was about this mysterious voice.

"Orem killed Dakarai in a fit of rage and took his own life because of it. Khai has fallen from sickness. Why do you wait for Delerath, Tamarah and Khenti?"

NightBlood coughed at the news. Three of her sons... dead? She stared at the ground in shock, words unable to form. She couldn't do anything. She couldn't cry. She couldn't howl out in misery. It would give away her position. Not to mention, she wanted to keep her identity a secret. Her howls would have been loud enough to penetrate the air of Sallin. Nightshade would know her attack had failed to kill her. She'd launch another one. There was no telling how many she'd hurt in the process.

She'd have to grieve later. If there was one thing she had control over, it was showing her outward feelings. She was dying inside at Zuka's words, but she couldn't show it. Not yet.

"Want to see them..." she finally answered through broken words.

Now the scent wafted into Zuka's nose. Her fur lay flat once again as she picked her head up in surprise. Her red eyes widened and bared into the darkness, searching for the form of wolf that BloodBound had seen. It couldn't be true. She was dead. Just like her three brothers.

"M-"

"Call them, Zuka..." Kuruk cut in.

If it really was who he thought, he wouldn't deny her request. The voice was familiar enough, even through its distortions. Even if it was impossible, it had to be her.

Zuka growled at her younger brother for a moment before lifting her head and letting out her urgent tone. It was the one she saved just for family meetings. The rest of the pack would stay away for now.

[Blackfeathr]

"Waiting..."

Finally, the form spoke, out of a scratched and distorted voice... they must be in that hollow tree BloodBound used to use to hide from Mortil and his training sessions as a pup. It never worked, Mortilitas always found him, but it was always worth a try.

"For who?" Kuruk demanded authoritatively.

"The rest," the unknown wolf asked, "Khai, Orem, Tamarah, Dakarai, Khenti..."

Kuruk gulped audibly as BloodBound growled, and they both looked at each other at the same time, sharing each others' thoughts. It wasn't enough that NightBlood was gone, Sallin must have heard of her bearing warrior pups that were to be beneficial to Arnlan. Killing them all on the spot would leave a deep, if not fatal, wound to Arnlan. But nature and fate took care of three already.

"Orem, Dakarai, and Khai are dead." BloodBound mumbled. His stomach knotted in response to his fallen brothers.

"Orem killed Dakarai in a fit of rage and took his own life because of it. Khai has fallen from sickness. Why do you wait for Tamarah and Khenti?"

The bear of a wolf started hearing coughing noises coming from the tree in front of them. He tilted his head, but said nothing. Who was this wolf?

"Want to see them..." the broken voice said.

Armageddon had heard bits of the conversation and was growing more concerned... there was a wolf, in hiding, asking for his children. Snarling, he ran up the hill with the rest of the brood. Hair standing on end, tail held high and tense, he pushed himself through to the front of the group, staring hard at the source of the voice. No bullshitting now, he would not have any blood on his paws, unless it were the blood of Sallin.

"Who are you!" he barked, fangs glittering white in the moonlight.

BloodBound glanced at his sister, and a sudden realization seemed to come to her as her fur flattened and her eyes became wide. BloodBound caught the scent as well, more concentrated, less diluted than he'd smelled, when it was carried by a wind. His tail hung limp between his legs and he looked back at the tree, his ears quivering orward in anticipation... was this wolf really... No... it couldn't be. It was impossible.

"M-"
"Call them, Zuka..."

Zuka's howl permeated the silence of Arnlan, calling to them the rest of their family. Armageddons hackles lowered slightly, his lips covering his bared teeth as he looked at his young. He sniffed the air curiously, and a different smell was carried in it... but... it was just a ghost... like he'd thought... right?

[Akree]

Here you are down on your knees again,
Trying to find air to breathe again.

Shafts of light pierced the forest canopy, staining the ground with patches of light and darkness, as if the woods themselves were trying to camouflage from a hidden predator. It could only be fitting the young male wolf sitting atop the ground thought sarcastically, almost bitterly, frowning in what could only be displeasure, mingled with something else. Something not to so easily identifiable.

He heaved himself on all four paws, making his way through the forest. One paw silently stepping in front of the other. The wolf found himself walking in circles around the perimeter of a rather round-shaped clearing, berry bushes and crooked trees forming into the very edge of the clearing. If one were to raise their gaze you would note only patches of the sky, most of it was covered with the gaunt branches of the trees and their grayed leaves. Khenti sighed, kicking a rock in frustration, watching as it bounced against the earth, one, twice, thrice before hitting a tree, kicking its bark and disappearing into the forest. The male growled feebly in frustration, gnashing his teeth and pawing the ground restlessly, something was amiss. He could easily tell that, something was wrong, it was almost like the very forest he had known so well from the beginning of his life was now far more hostile than it should be. The silence, instead of welcoming, was oppressing, it was almost like every shadow, and every sound was a threat that should not be there. This shouldn’t be so, Khenti chanted like a mantra, it should be different, he insisted against the throbbing of his skull.

The lack of sleep was driving him uneasy, he realized. It was that, the lack of sleep was now affecting his way of thinking, he had just to rest. If he got some of that sleep he might be able to confront the situation with soothed nerves, which is just what he needed. A clear head, free from any concern. But he knew what it was that racked his mind, and it wasn’t sleep. It was guilt.

The guilt of the death of his dear dead sibling.

Dakarai…

The suddenness of the name made him pause in his insane pacing, his breath caught at his chest and his heart seemed to squeeze itself inside his ribs. It was guilt that clouded his thoughts; it was guilt that made him believe there was something threatening in every shadow when there really wasn’t. It was guilt, that horrible emotion that seemed to cease every other feeling, but instead his mind was clouded with doubt and that horrible feeling.

My fault, my fault, my fault, my fault…

Breathe.

Two, four, six…

Breathe.

Eight, ten, twelve…

Khenti screwed his eyes shut, just trying to concentrate on his thoughts. Trying to make everything else go away. It was almost painfully that the memory fluttered to the front of his mind, forcing all his attention to it, replaying like a fine filmed movie before his eyes.

Then a howl, a single howl that pierced the silence. He knew the call; his ears snapped forward, it was a call reserved only for his family. But, would he answer it? There was no need for his presence, he was sure; there was never a need for his presence. The young male had almost made up his mind to ignore it and simply relish in the pain his own guilt brought forward, but, in the end, the urgency of the tone was what made him response. The final notes lingering on his mind like a slim reminder of those times were it all seemed fine, with his mother next to him, with all his siblings laughing joyfully at the small cares of the pups. But those times were far gone and there was nothing but a grim future looming forward, he had only to face it…

He forced his paws to move before his mind would fully take over his actions. Hurrying to answer the call, just as long as they would rid himself of those thoughts and the guilt. In a moment, but rather seemed like hours of running through the forest, dodging rocks, trees, water and imperfections in the land he made it to the clearing. He noted with puzzlement that the whole family seemed to be reunited, all staring intently on one spot, outside of the clearing. He peered at all their faces, but he couldn’t discern any specific emotion that would hint on what was going on, so, almost regrettably he surged forward, head low, his pose merely hinting on how physically and mentally tired the young adult was. What would a month without proper sleep could do to you. He didn’t even say a word, merely gestured at Zuka with a look to explain why he was being called, before raising his eyes to what everyone seemed to be starring.

And only surrender will help you now
I love you, please see and believe again.

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[nightblood]

NightBlood gasped as she saw the youngest of her first litter made his appearance. He had grown into a fine young wolf. She had to stop herself from giving an audible chuckle. From the look of his face, she could tell that he had been over thinking about something. Tamarah would be next. No doubt, she would be smelling of herbs and medicines. The female sighed in recollection of the scent of Ravenshard's den.

It was then that it hit her; how much she truly missed her old home. She couldn't wait any longer. It was too painful. She needed to be back in the arms of her family, brushing pelts and rubbing noses with her loved ones. She'd held back long enough.

Slowly recall all your mind. Why, you're soul's gone cold and all hope has run dry... Blood cut herself off as she started to take a step out of the hollow tree. Would they even recognize her? Dead inside, never enough to forget that you're one of the lonely... She looked down at her fur. More specifically at the scars that parted it, left gaps of skin on an otherwise flawless coat. She looked as if she'd actually been dead for as long as she'd been away. Had she gotten the chance to find water and seen her reflection, she would have noticed a new scar on her face as well as black circles under her eyes. She looked so much older than what she really was. Slowly recall all your mind...

"If I scare you now, don't run from me..."

Zuka's ears perked at the whisper. She could hear every word. No doubt the others were straining their ears as well, picking up every breath that the strange wolf exhaled. She whined in recognition, nudging Kuruk as her tail started to wag. It wasn't possible, but she knew the voice. Six months of being sure she wouldn't hear it again, and here it was, whispered on the wind itself.

Kuruk whined back at the nudge, taking another eager, but cautious step forward. He still couldn't believe it, but he was absolutely sure now that his mother was hiding in the shadows before him. He remembered with painful vividness, the day she died. It was now plain to him exactly why she was hiding. Her injuries had been so severe that day that she probably still bore the scars. That was why she sounded so different. That was why she was concealing herself in the shadows. He waged his tail anyway and pulled his ears back. He didn't need to hear more and she didn't need to be concerned with looks. NightBlood was his mother. End of story. He didn't care how bad the scars were.

Surethim joined in and walked eagerly to the front of the group, but not completely passing BloodBound. Motega took a place just behind Kuruk's shoulder and matched his excited tone, tail nearly flying off. Everyone knew now. As hard as it was to believe, his mother had defied logic itself. NightBlood was back in Arnlan.

The dark female lowered her head and pulled her ears back, horrified that the ones she loved so much would be scared by her scars or take pity on her. Either one was terrifying. She limped forward, leaving the hollow tree behind her. There wasn't much light, but the shadows of Arnlan were not impenetrable by the eyes of its inhabitants. As she approached her family, she watched for the shock in their eyes. She stopped when she was sure they'd all had a good enough view of her face. She was still a few yards away from them as she lowered her head and looked darkly at a scar on her front leg. It was one of the many, many reasons she didn't want to return.

"I've been hiding my pain, you see..."

[Shantik]

The night was so cold and dark. Tamarah paused, paws and forelegs shaking as she sat back from digging for roots. This might not be the best time to do it, but it wasn't like Arnlan ever really saw warmth and sunlight. Besides, she'd heard tale of a deadly illness sweeping through the lands and the pack would need to be ready, just in case.

She paused as she heard the howl and glanced up. Zuka? Was something wrong? She tilted her head, but leaned down to grab the herbs she'd gathered, just in case, and started off, a little tense. She might need to help.

Although she had never been all that close to her siblings thanks to her prominant lack in real physical strength, it didn't mean she didn't want to help them if something went wrong. Three had passed. She couldn't let any more die.

As she came closer, she had to stop at the new smell that hit her. Wait, it wasn't new. She recognized it. But only faintly. She blinked, shook off memories that she didn't understand yet, and padded out setting down the herbs and looking around. Who was hurt? She abruptly noticed the shadowy figure, and blinked. Who was this strange... her eyes widened as she recognized her. It was hard, under all those scars, and in the dark. But it was the smell that really brought back memories and Tam whimpered with happiness. Like her siblings, she never quite connected right with her mother either. But here was a chance to, after all these years. But she was also worried - her mother had a look on her that Tem couldn't identify. One word she could try to sum it up with was depression. But it was more than that. The thought that this female before her had once been thought dead... Tamarah couldn't fathom it.

Tem stepped closer, ears back as she approached her mother. "Mother...? Is that... really you?" She asked slowly, using the kind of tone she would use to speak to a wolf that had just gotten brought back from the brink of death. Which her mother really had, by all means.

(Sorry if this is bad. D:)

[Blackfeathr]

As his mother, the wolf he thought had been dead for most of his life, emerged from the hollow tree, BloodBound's heart seemed to turn to lead and drop straight into his stomach. He couldn't believe what he was seeing. His throat closed up and he couldn't speak, even though his mouth opened and formed words. His back end gave out and he sat heavily on the cold earth in disbelief. This was... some sort of dream... this couldn't be... how...?

Armageddon's brilliant aquamarine eyes widened, transfixed on the form of his dead mate, seeming to reanimate herself in front of him. His life was shattered after her death, he often had wondered why he was still in existence. And now all those troubled times of despair seemed to blow away like fine sand in a gentle wind. NightBlood was back. This wasn't a ghost, and if it was, it was the most solid ghost he'd ever seen.
"N...NightBlood?"

Looked like her, sounded like her, smelled like her. Must be her. BloodBound finally came to this conclusion and started laughing joyfully, bounding up to her and lifting his bear-like arms to embrace her in a gentle hug.
"Mother... it's been so long! How... did you... survive?!" He wanted to bury his face in her fur and cry. Even if he was supposed to be a man, there were times that called for him to break down. Times like these.