Post by Addie on Apr 28, 2009 8:32:07 GMT -5
...Because somebody needed to say it.
...
Alright, all. I know I haven't been participating in my own forum here, and I have many reasons for that. However, I'm starting to see that tensions are getting high and some people seem to be getting agitated at the lack of RPing and general activity here, so I figure I finally need to say something and explain why I haven't been working on the new comic yet or taking care of the board.
First and foremost, my health has gotten worse the past year or so. I hesitate to admit this, as I only mentioned my ACM once in reply to another member's thread discussing their similar health problem on the BBA a few years ago, and was later referred to as a "sicky" who wouldn't be able to handle the job of moderator in response to being suggested as one. Sadly, as my inability to keep up a comic and run this board suggests, they were right. Nevertheless, I'm to the point where I can barely function anymore. I have no energy, I'm sleeping way too much, I can't stand up or bend over without just about passing out (I can't even do simple things like shave my legs in the shower anymore because of this), I literally cannot concentrate on anything or keep up coherent thoughts, I hurt all over, and my neck pain literally never goes away. It's the main reason I barely draw anymore. I am actually thinking about pursuing surgery at this point, which would include removing part of my skull and spine permanently. My mother and I are most likely going to fly back in July to see the specialists who diagnosed the two of us with our ACM back in 2005 to see what can be done for us regarding this. Since each case of ACM is different, surgery might not even be likely to help me (especially considering my case is a variant, coupled with Occipitalization of the Atlas), in which case I'd just have to live with this for the rest of my life. Even if I am recommended for surgery, only 50% of ACM sufferers who undergo it become completely symptom free. Another 20-30% improve, and about 20% don't improve or actually get worse. Even if the surgery is successful, symptoms can come back, sometimes even years later. Not the best odds. But at this point, I'd rather risk the surgery than live with all the pain and other aggravating symptoms that I'm forced to right now. And it's all this that is weighing heavily on my mind and distracting me right now.
The economy is really fucking us over right now, too. Mike's (Duke) mum is the only one in the house who has a job at the moment, but they are shutting the business she works for down very soon due to the owners screwing up and not giving a crap about their own business. Someone has offered her and a few coworkers a job somewhere else, but this isn't a guarantee. Her boyfriend (the actual owner of the house), who also worked for the same company, was laid off back in December, and he only has two weeks of unemployment left now. I can't look for a job right now since I am going back to Cali again in the beginning of June, so I can't help out yet. If worse comes to worse, we will lose the house and, if unable to find a place that allows pets, will have to give Ozzy and their cat Gracie away, which would be horrible for all of us. Completely worst case, I would have to move back to California, and Mike and I would again be separated by distance until he finished college. All that probably won't happen (I'm determined to not let it happen), but it's still a possibility if we can't find jobs that give us enough to pay the bills very soon.
While I am trying to work on the comic again (Mike was able to afford some some watercolors for my birthday, so I'm a bit inspired at the moment), we still need to come up with a solid storyline and events. I have enough to create the first few new Kloteck pages, but I'm afraid to start on them before we know what we are going to be doing beyond that. Also, again, I'm doing very bad health-wise right now. It may take a lot more time, but I certainly don't intend to keep letting the comic stagnate for too much longer.
Now, I didn't really plan on bringing this up until the comic started up again, but I figure I should go ahead and do so now anyway: as soon as I begin to post the new pages, I plan on having us start over on a new board, which would be much more organized. I won't release too many more details for now, but that's pretty much the plan at the moment.
I'm sorry I don't have more news for you guys, but I wanted to let everyone know what the situation is as it stands right now. Yes, I'm having problems that are keeping me from RPing/drawing/whatever, and I'm sorry, but I can't do much about it right now. Please be patient, don't start getting mad at other members for this or that, and try and look forward to all the new stuff that we are trying to plan:). It might take longer for things to pick up than is ideal, but we are trying.
- Marit
...
Alright, all. I know I haven't been participating in my own forum here, and I have many reasons for that. However, I'm starting to see that tensions are getting high and some people seem to be getting agitated at the lack of RPing and general activity here, so I figure I finally need to say something and explain why I haven't been working on the new comic yet or taking care of the board.
First and foremost, my health has gotten worse the past year or so. I hesitate to admit this, as I only mentioned my ACM once in reply to another member's thread discussing their similar health problem on the BBA a few years ago, and was later referred to as a "sicky" who wouldn't be able to handle the job of moderator in response to being suggested as one. Sadly, as my inability to keep up a comic and run this board suggests, they were right. Nevertheless, I'm to the point where I can barely function anymore. I have no energy, I'm sleeping way too much, I can't stand up or bend over without just about passing out (I can't even do simple things like shave my legs in the shower anymore because of this), I literally cannot concentrate on anything or keep up coherent thoughts, I hurt all over, and my neck pain literally never goes away. It's the main reason I barely draw anymore. I am actually thinking about pursuing surgery at this point, which would include removing part of my skull and spine permanently. My mother and I are most likely going to fly back in July to see the specialists who diagnosed the two of us with our ACM back in 2005 to see what can be done for us regarding this. Since each case of ACM is different, surgery might not even be likely to help me (especially considering my case is a variant, coupled with Occipitalization of the Atlas), in which case I'd just have to live with this for the rest of my life. Even if I am recommended for surgery, only 50% of ACM sufferers who undergo it become completely symptom free. Another 20-30% improve, and about 20% don't improve or actually get worse. Even if the surgery is successful, symptoms can come back, sometimes even years later. Not the best odds. But at this point, I'd rather risk the surgery than live with all the pain and other aggravating symptoms that I'm forced to right now. And it's all this that is weighing heavily on my mind and distracting me right now.
The economy is really fucking us over right now, too. Mike's (Duke) mum is the only one in the house who has a job at the moment, but they are shutting the business she works for down very soon due to the owners screwing up and not giving a crap about their own business. Someone has offered her and a few coworkers a job somewhere else, but this isn't a guarantee. Her boyfriend (the actual owner of the house), who also worked for the same company, was laid off back in December, and he only has two weeks of unemployment left now. I can't look for a job right now since I am going back to Cali again in the beginning of June, so I can't help out yet. If worse comes to worse, we will lose the house and, if unable to find a place that allows pets, will have to give Ozzy and their cat Gracie away, which would be horrible for all of us. Completely worst case, I would have to move back to California, and Mike and I would again be separated by distance until he finished college. All that probably won't happen (I'm determined to not let it happen), but it's still a possibility if we can't find jobs that give us enough to pay the bills very soon.
While I am trying to work on the comic again (Mike was able to afford some some watercolors for my birthday, so I'm a bit inspired at the moment), we still need to come up with a solid storyline and events. I have enough to create the first few new Kloteck pages, but I'm afraid to start on them before we know what we are going to be doing beyond that. Also, again, I'm doing very bad health-wise right now. It may take a lot more time, but I certainly don't intend to keep letting the comic stagnate for too much longer.
Now, I didn't really plan on bringing this up until the comic started up again, but I figure I should go ahead and do so now anyway: as soon as I begin to post the new pages, I plan on having us start over on a new board, which would be much more organized. I won't release too many more details for now, but that's pretty much the plan at the moment.
I'm sorry I don't have more news for you guys, but I wanted to let everyone know what the situation is as it stands right now. Yes, I'm having problems that are keeping me from RPing/drawing/whatever, and I'm sorry, but I can't do much about it right now. Please be patient, don't start getting mad at other members for this or that, and try and look forward to all the new stuff that we are trying to plan:). It might take longer for things to pick up than is ideal, but we are trying.
- Marit
Just take care of yourself Kahvs, we'll be here for you. <3
I definetely reccomend the surgery; just for the whole 'better to risk it' thing. And just pray it goes through alright. 
Hope it's a confidence-booster. XD